There’s really no way to fully prepare for becoming a mother. And for high achieving women, motherhood can really shake our self-trust and self-confidence. Perhaps more deeply than we’ve ever experienced before.
For so many women, as our self-confidence wanes, we start focusing more and more of our energy on our children. And we forget to nurture ourselves at this critical time. Not as mothers, but as individuals.
It’s a slippery slope. I know because it happened to me.
It took me a few years to figure out, but I learned how to heal my shaky self-confidence, and actually make it stronger than ever.
How? I reclaimed my intuitive guidance and started taking aligned action. Beautifully, because we’re all born with the gift of intuitive guidance, this is available to all mothers, to everyone, who is struggling with a loss in self-trust.
Perhaps my story will sound familiar to you . . .
My two year old son is huge into trains, so I create different track configurations almost daily. Recently, as I was putting one together as he watched—an overpass, intersections, lots of loops—I flashed back to five or six years ago when I did this with my daughter.
And it hit me what a radically different experience it was a few years ago.
Because my self-confidence was on terribly shaky ground.
Rather than being a fun playtime with her I remember being full of anxiety and self-doubt. I vividly recall thinking that I literally could not build a train track for her. And, specifically, I couldn’t build a “good” train track.
How couldn’t I do this? What kind of mother, a grown adult, can’t build a f*cking train track for their child to enjoy?
Each time I tried it would drive me nearly to tears. Then, I would actually be ashamed at what I built for her. And (silently) beat myself up even more.
So I eventually asked my husband to build the tracks for her instead—in a nonchalant way, of course, so he had no absolutely idea the angst that was behind it.
I remember (sending great compassion to my past self) that my toxic, self-berating thoughts were so LOUD and so pervasive. With building train tracks . . . and just about every other aspect of my life back then.
It wasn’t just about motherhood. Several life circumstances had deeply shaken me. My mom’s death during my pregnancy. A cross-country move. Living in a big city for the first time. Secondary infertility. A new job in a new field. Yes, there were a lot of circumstances.
But, more accurately, I had allowed my thoughts about those circumstances to deeply affect me. Thoughts that were especially harsh because I had lost so much connection with myself. I didn’t even realize it.
I eventually spiraled into a state of severe apathy. I’d experienced clinical depression before, but the predominant feeling then had been sadness. I’d never before experienced such a relentless state of apathy. I struggled with making nearly any decision, and was plagued by self-doubt and second-guessing my decision when I did make one.
As a high achieving person, this was a truly dreadful place to be. The very foundation of my identity felt shaky.
Exercise, time outside, therapy, time with friends and loved ones–they all helped but didn’t address what was really going on.
I had lost connection with myself, with what I wanted in life, and with how I could create self-fulfillment.
Then, I was blessed to meet two wonderful coaches. I wasn’t looking for them. I didn’t really know anything about coaching or what it could do for me.
And this changed everything. Our work together reawakened something in me that I hadn’t felt in a long time. A very long time.
I gradually peeled away the layers of toxic thoughts that had built up. I engaged in honest introspection and committed to the inner work, and I began to listen to myself again. My true self. My inner wisdom. My intuitive guidance. I heard my intuitive guidance. I gained clarity on how I could create my self-fulfillment. And I felt my self-trust rebuilding, because I was finally being heard by my own self.
As my self-trust began rebuilding, I was able to fully commit to myself. And then, I starting TAKING ACTION. Instead of seeking excuses not to act or justifications for delaying action, I actively looked for how to make action possible. Through it all, my coaches have kept me accountable and moving forward, through failures, through successes.
Learning as I go. Refining as I go.
Through many actions of all shapes and sizes, my life has transformed from the inside out. I’m light years away from where I was just a few years ago, and I keep evolving.
With each action, my self-trust and self-confidence has strengthened. It keeps strengthening every day. It strengthens each and every time I take action aligned with my intuitive guidance.
Most importantly, I now have a deeply loving relationship with myself. I love myself unconditionally. And what a gift that is to my family and to the world.
Now, I’m honored to guide other women and mothers who are traveling this path. Everyone’s path is unique but it’s priceless to have the support of a person who has been there themselves. It transformed my life, and it can do the same for you.
Are you feeling called to commit to yourself? To heal and strengthen your confidence, and create your own fulfillment?
Everything you need is already within you. It’s your timeless wisdom. Your intuitive guidance. And Nature is your portal to access it. Apply for your free Breakthrough Session today! Learn what intuitive life coaching is all about!